Ruin is the road to transformation.
Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat Pray Love
It’s been a while, Internet. So, what’s gone on recently?
I basically rage quit the job I had been at for six and a half years back in April. Yep, Starbuck handed in her two weeks notice at GameStop after a particularly terrible set of days; decided my returning depression wasn’t worth it. I was already working 44 hours a week, fighting with my boss about my availability (Hmm, who’d have thought a baby would slightly change my life, eh DL?), and feeling terrible about the fact I was coming home so physically and emotionally exhausted, I barely had energy to be a mom and a wife.
And it was killing me on the inside.
Then, I spent two months applying for different things; trying to get out of the retail sphere. I wanted to have my weekends back, and I wanted my holidays back as well. (Again, kid.) That didn’t go well, either. I tried. I’ve gained a lot of skills that are most certainly transferable to the not retail sphere, but no one seemed all that interested in taking a chance on me.
During this time, I got back into streaming; I actually attained Twitch Affiliate status too. So I guess I wasn’t a total failure during this period of time. Have I been able to stream recently, though? Nope, not a lick.
I ended up going back to the first job I had back when we moved to town, something I’m still trying to reconcile. It’s back to retail, yet again. It’s only part time, but again, it’s still retail. Recently, I put in an application to a really cool startup in town, and I’m still waiting to hear back. My interview was most certainly just so-so, and it’s an uphill battle I know (I’m self-taught, in a way, in marketing and stuff like that). But, they enjoyed my writing style I showcased in my cover letter, so that made me feel a little better about the whole thing.
What’s new for this site?
When I wasn’t bringing in any income, I shut off my web hosting temporarily. Now that it’s back, this is also going to become the home for the semi-scheduled podcast I’ve started, called #TheRandoCast. (Another blog incoming about that.)
With Borderlands 3 and Start Wars Jedi: Fallen Order coming out, I’d also love to dedicate more blog posts to those games too. And get back to trying to teach myself some mad video editing skills. (Autumn from Inside Gaming/Formerly Sugar Pine 7 is a major source of inspiration.)
I hate the fact that this seems to fall by the wayside every time life happens. Everyone keeps saying that new parents need to have an identity outside their new kid, but it’s harder to actually DO when it gets down to it. I hate that my depression can just bitch slap me out of nowhere, but it’s something I know I just have to keep fighting.
Especially in this day and age, where games have come under attack, I want this to be a place where games are celebrated, and the people that make them are celebrated too.
Oh well. Back to hopefully streaming those positive vibes only.